Saturday, May 14, 2011

Changing Connotations about Sluts and Studs

Unfortunately the Slut/Stud hypocrisy is still alive and well throughout the world, but a slow shift is occurring in how the word "slut" is deployed.

As sex positivity becomes more and more prevalent, the term "slut" has slowly started to gain a more positive connotation. The change reflects a model of a woman who pursues what she wants versus one who services anyone who whips it out out of a sense of obligation.

I suspect that The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Catherine Liszt has had a huge role in helping to create this shift from slut as sex toy to a strong woman who refuses to remain chaste simply because "society" insists that any woman who expresses and acts on her sexual urges is a "whore." That whole wretched dichotomy that precribes women as either Madonnas or Whores, but never a marriage of the two.

More women than ever in memorable history have wanted to free themselves of the shame that society places on women who revel in exploring their sexuality, no matter what form that exploration may assume.

In my world, a woman who proudly declares herself a "slut" is an admirable woman, because she is saying:
"Yeah, that's right. I like to fuck, what's it to you? Sex is not wrong and me taking what I want is not wrong. I will fuck who I want, how I want, when I want, where I want. Society be damned; I remain true to my own desires."

Of course, I also recognize that some women really enjoy being sex toys for men. That's what gets them off, total lack of control. But, it is their conscious decision to play that role that makes them much different than the woman who approaches sex as more of a man's prerogative than as the pursuit of her own desires.

A few years back, I came to find it quite ironic that "stud" is supposed to be a term with positive connotations. I mean, look at what that term means when not applied to humans.

A stud is nothing more than a prime piece of breeding meat. It says nothing about skill or the pleasure that the guy can give, just that he can manage to get a piece of meat and get off in the process. That's hardly more of a positive thing to be than someone who merely lets men mount her.

What's the word for the recipient of a stud's services? Is there a catch all phrase for that? (For instance, "bitch" is the female counterpart to "stud" in the canine realm.) Such a term would really be the most fitting thing to call those type of women, if you're into the whole labeling thing that is.

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